Updated: Jun 29
Did you know that we do couples therapy at The Wellbeing Therapy Hut? But what is couples therapy and why could a couple need it? Should you only access it if you’re on the brink of a breakup or divorce? Does it mean you don’t love each other? Here are some of the facts about couples therapy and why it could work for you.
There is no getting away from the fact that all couples will experience some kind of conflict. It could be about money and what it is spent on, it could be about raising children or about personal and intimate aspects of life. It could just be the daily stress of life that can be overwhelming. When this happens, some couples will know what to do and what works for them both to overcome the tension and conflict. For other couples, having conflicts and then not having proper communication, can lead to some deeper issues.
It is important to remember that some conflicts are normal in a relationship or marriage. You can both have different needs and different desires. That is why it is key, when aiming for a healthy relationship, to handle any conflict successfully, rather than just avoid any conflict at all. When conflict resolution is going well, it can lead to communication and compromise; finding the middle ground. But what can happen from time to time, is giving each other silent treatment or not dealing with the conflict and addressing the issues.
Couples therapy can help couples to have some strategies to help them deal with conflict, as well as address what healthy communication looks like for them, as a couple. By avoiding resolution or communication, it can lead to resentment, frustration, and behaviour that can be passive-aggressive, which can lead to a lack of closeness and intimacy, and can be why things like cheating or adultery happens.
If it feels like you and your partner are growing apart or just aren’t able to resolve conflicts well, then couples therapy can help.
Is couples therapy something that all couples need?
Not all couples will need therapy together, and that is fine. However, there are benefits to couples therapy, even when you’re not in a particular conflict in the relationship. Couples therapy can help to improve communication skills, being able to understand each other better, being able to be a better team, and improve parenting together, if you have children. If you are experiencing some problems, though, then that is when couples therapy is definitely needed. Couples therapy can help to iron out some issues, and help to overall improve the relationship.
Some of the reasons you might seek couples therapy could be because you feel like you’re growing apart as a couple. You could be having particular conflicts about certain things, such as money. You might have something big happen such as adultery, and could be thinking of divorce.
Some people will stay in a relationship or marriage, even if it feels unhappy, just until divorce or breaking up feels like the only option. But you can use couples therapy to help, so that you don’t have to get to that point.
How does couples therapy work?
There is one thing that couples therapy is not, and that is not about placing blame or pointing fingers at each other. Instead, it is about giving the couple some tools and tips for improving communication and speaking openly, so that you can both ask more readily for what you need and be able to know what your partner needs too.
In couples therapy, you can talk about existing problems and look for solutions to end the conflicts you are experiencing. The therapist is a neutral party that won’t take sides or look to put blame on one of the parties over another. Instead, the job of the therapist is to facilitate some understanding and help you to explore what will work best for you to fix things. There will be some work to do outside of the sessions, but ultimately, there are many benefits to couples therapy.
The benefits of couples therapy
Develop a closer relationship
Heal old wounds
Learn steps to better resolve conflict
Set goals as a couple
If you’d like to find out more about couples therapy, get in touch with us today.