Why Are We So Obsessed with The Traitors? A Psychological and Therapeutic Perspective

It’s hard to ignore it. Each series of The Traitors grips the nation, dominating conversations at work, on social media, and around dinner tables. We shout at the screen, form fierce loyalties, feel genuine betrayal, and experience a surprising amount of emotional investment for a reality TV show filmed in a Scottish castle. But why? What is it about The Traitors that taps so deeply into our collective psyche?

From a psychological point of view, The Traitors is far more than entertainment. It is a social experiment, a mirror held up to human behaviour, attachment, trust, fear, and morality. In many ways, it activates the same emotional systems that therapists work with every day.

Trust, Betrayal and Attachment

At its core, The Traitors is about trust, and what happens when trust is broken. Humans are wired for connection; from infancy, we rely on others for safety and survival. Trust allows communities to function, relationships to form, and identities to develop. When we watch contestants build alliances and then betray them, we are witnessing something that feels deeply personal, even if it’s happening to strangers.

Therapeutically, betrayal is one of the most painful emotional experiences a person can endure. It can trigger feelings of shame (“How didn’t I see this?”), hypervigilance (“Who can I trust now?”), and grief. Watching these dynamics unfold in a contained environment allows viewers to explore these emotions at a safe distance. We can feel the outrage, sadness or vindication without personal risk, a kind of emotional rehearsal.

Projection: Seeing Ourselves on Screen

One reason the show feels so compelling is projection. We subconsciously place ourselves into the game: What would I do? Would I lie? Would I spot the traitor? Would I be loyal to the end or play strategically?

From a psychological perspective, this taps into our sense of identity and moral self-image. Most people like to see themselves as “good” and trustworthy. The Traitors challenges this by presenting moral ambiguity. The show forces us to confront uncomfortable questions: Is lying always wrong? Does survival justify deception? These are questions therapists often explore with clients who are grappling with guilt, boundaries, or people-pleasing tendencies.

Group Dynamics and Social Anxiety

The round table scenes are particularly fascinating. They showcase groupthink, scapegoating, power dynamics, and the fear of exclusion. Humans have an innate need to belong; being rejected by the group once meant death. That ancient wiring hasn’t disappeared, even if the consequences are now emotional rather than physical.

Many viewers resonate with the anxiety of being misunderstood or wrongly accused. Therapeutically, this mirrors experiences of workplace conflict, family dynamics, or childhood social trauma. Watching others navigate, or fail to navigate, these moments can be both validating and distressing. It explains why some viewers find the show thrilling, while others find it emotionally exhausting.

Control, Uncertainty and the Illusion of Safety

In uncertain times, socially, politically, economically, The Traitors offers a structured world with clear rules. Even though deception reigns, the boundaries are known. There is comfort in that. Psychologically, humans cope better with stress when uncertainty feels contained.

From a therapeutic standpoint, this mirrors why people are drawn to stories, rituals, and even therapy itself: they provide a framework for understanding chaos. Watching a game where uncertainty is expected and “allowed” can feel strangely soothing, even when emotions run high.

The Shadow Self: Exploring What We Suppress

Carl Jung spoke of the “shadow” - the parts of ourselves we deny or suppress, such as selfishness, manipulation, or aggression. The Traitors gives permission to explore these traits without acting on them. We can secretly admire a clever deception or ruthless strategy while maintaining our everyday moral identity.

Therapists often help clients integrate their shadow rather than reject it. In this sense, the show becomes a cultural container for exploring darker aspects of human nature in a socially acceptable way.

Why It Stays With Us

Ultimately, The Traitors resonates because it reflects real emotional truths. It shows how people behave under pressure, how quickly trust can fracture, and how complex “good” and “bad” really are. It invites us to reflect on our own relationships, boundaries, and values.

Perhaps our national obsession isn’t about the game at all. It’s about recognising ourselves, our fears, loyalties, blind spots, and resilience, played out in dramatic form. And in watching others navigate betrayal, uncertainty and connection, we are, in a small but meaningful way, processing our own.

That might be the real magic of The Traitors: it entertains us while quietly doing what therapy often does, helping us understand what it means to be human.